We have been busy.
And I could say that it is because of all the busyness that I have not been able to write. But that would be a lie. I haven't written a blog or a newsletter because I am unsure what I should say. We are still hurting. Rory regularly tells me that he wants to be in Oaxaca, to see his friends there, to go drop off the laundry, to walk to the mercado. Jinora is still afraid of white people and she tried to follow a family speaking Spanish last week while we were out. Mark and I, well, let's just say we are still in culture shock over how expensive it is to live in the Pacific Northwest, among other things.
We have small dreams that are coming into focus (The Yoga Rebellion) and bigger dreams that we are not sure how they will work. But we continue to pursue different avenues. I would explain more, but what continues to be difficult is all the nay-saying, from ourselves and others.
But I have never been very good at listening to nays. I am more about the yays. The reaching out, the looking forward, the spontaneous trying of new things! If you know me at all, you know that I love long seasons of change followed by short seasons of calm. While my resume seems to have finally evened itself out, you should have seen me way back when. A little wilder, a little crazier, a little less put together (see: a lot less put together). The times in my life when I have tried to put "what I should be doing" first rather than what I want to be doing? It has never worked out. I have been unhappy, miserable even, and oh so broken of spirit. Breaking away has always been my modus operandi. Figuring out what works for me and pursuing that path, regardless of the sideways glances and "tut-tut's" from the peanut gallery.
You have all thought, once or twice, "That Malia girl, she is crazy." It was maybe when I purchased a one way ticket to South America. Or moved took a job in Italy for a family I had never met. Or decided to leave said job to move back to the PNW. Or when Mark and I had our first kiddo in our first year of marriage. Or when we decided to move to Mexico with two tinies. Or whenever we talk about wanting to own our own business. Or when we talk about purchasing a sailboat. Or any other moment of my life, really. Because sometimes it does seem like I am crazy, like I might fail. Maybe it always seems like that.
But here's a thing to consider - what is wrong with failing? What is wrong with trying something outside the box? My entire generation was told we could be anything, do anything we wanted to. And then we were scolded the rest of our lives for not being "successful." Maybe it is okay to do things differently than someone else. There shouldn't be a designation of normal. Because everyone chooses something different and that should be okay. We should support people doing whatever it is that makes them happiest, that brings them the most joy, the most love, the most wonder. We should do everything we can to make sure the people around us are pursuing their dreams and helping them succeed! (Unless they are attempting to commit genocide or some other horrific crime, these are obviously generalizations).
Not all who wander are lost, darlings.
But maybe, just maybe, some of us enjoy getting little lost?
Stay with us, friends. Continue the journey. We promise BIG CRAZY things are coming. And they probably won't ever stop coming.